Working with Families

• Author: Elizabeth Kelley
• Pages: 259-262

259

Chapter

If I had a nickel for every time a mother or father or sibling or significant other

called me complaining that a loved one’s attorney was not returning phone

calls . . . Perhaps the family member has dropped off medical records to the

lawyer’s office and this has not been acknowledged. Perhaps the family has

even tried to call the court or the judge.

Working with the family of a client with mental disabilities is time-consuming

and delicate, but it is vital if you are to effectively represent that client. This

chapter identifies some of the situations you may encounter with families and

provides some strategies I and other lawyers have used.

• • •

When they come to you, they are bitter.

Often, by the time a family meets with you, that family has endured

years or even decades of misunderstanding. The family has had to deal

with neighbors, schools, and employers who do not understand the nature

of their loved one’s disability, and may be unwilling to make accommoda-

tions. Thus, you may have to deal with a good deal of anger and resent-

ment. And the fact that you keep a lawyerly demeanor may eventually

provoke criticism that you don’t care. Explain that you are a lawyer and

you must work within the legal system. This is not to say that you cannot

be creative or a passionate advocate. But you are an attorney and must

work within the system.

I know one attorney who always asks the client and the family “What

is the goal?” This helps focus attention and allows the attorney to explain

Working with Families

Elizabeth Kelley

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