Why we ignore nagging spouse.

PositionYOUR LIFE

A professor's desire to understand why her husband often seemed to ignore her requests for help around the house has resulted in new research findings. "My husband, while very charming in many ways, has an annoying tendency of doing exactly the opposite of what I would like him to do in many situations," declares Tanya L Chartrand, associate professor of marketing and psychology at Duke University, Durham, N.C.

Chartrand demonstrated that some people will act in ways that are not to their own benefit simply because they wish to avoid doing what other people want them to. Psychologists call this reactance--a person's tendency to resist social influences that he or she perceive as threats to his or her autonomy. Chartrand found that people do not necessarily oppose others' wishes intentionally. Instead, even the slightest nonconscious exposure to the name of a significant person in their life is enough to bring about reactance and cause them to rebel against that person's wishes.

"Psychologists have known for some time that reactance can cause a person to work in opposition to another person's desires," Chartrand notes. "We wanted to know whether reactance could occur even when exposure to a significant other, and their associated wishes for us, takes place at a nonconscious level."

In the first experiment, participants were asked to name a significant person in their lives whom they perceive to be controlling and wanted them to work hard, and another significant and...

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