W is for wrong.

AuthorDurst, Will
PositionOff the Map - On George W. Bush

Love him, or hate him, you've got to admire George Bush's ability not to let reality get in the way of his foreign policy. Take Iraq. Please. So far he has been as wrong as Wyoming sushi and he continues to be wrong in a tank without brakes, headed down a hill, towards a Boy Scout camp, at the break of dawn sort of way.

He was wrong about weapons of mass destruction. He was wrong about ties to Al Qaeda. He was wrong about how long it would take. How much it would cost. How many troops were needed. What kind of armor was required. He was wrong about being greeted with flowers and candy, unless by flowers and candy he meant improvised explosive devices and suicide bombers. The only two things he's been right about are being born a Bush and not going hunting with Cheney.

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

We're entering the eighth year of being held captive to a global attitude that is wronger than Dane Cook's film career. The exact same drumbeat that preceded our incursion into Iraq is being pounded out by the very same percussionists about the evils of its neighbor, Iran. And just like dj vu all over again, we are being sent more mixed messages than Britney Spears editing the latest edition of Dr. Spock's Baby and Child Care .

Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice insists we have no plans to invade Iran. Which is just plain silly. Of course, we have plans to invade Iran. We're America. That's what we do. We make plans. Hell, we probably have plans to invade the Vatican. And let's not forget the last country we had no plans to invade, we invaded the hell out of.

Meanwhile, Dick Cheney, a man who sees it as his personal mission to create new parameters for the word "bellicose," is warning Iran he's prepared to go ballistic. Literally and figuratively. He said, "We will not allow Iran to have a nuclear weapon." Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is being compared to Adolf Hitler and if that doesn't sound familiar, you haven't been paying attention. All we need now is someone to talk about how they don't want the smoking gun to be a mushroom cloud while Colin Powell holds a slide show at the U.N.

I understand...

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