Troubletown: free guide to secrecy for government employees.

• Author: Dangle, Lloyd
• Position: Cartoon

SECRET: INFORMATION THAT MAKES THE PRESIDENT LOOK BAD.

THE LEAK OF THE KATRINA VIDEO HURT OUR NATIONAL SECURITY.

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

NOT SECRET: CERTAIN PARTS OF SECRET PAPERS THAT DESTROY OPPONENTS WITHOUT GIVING AWAY THE PARTS THAT MAKE BUSH LOOK BAD.

THE TRUTH MUST COME OUT.

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

CLASSIFIED: THINGS CONGRESS AUTHORIZED WITHOUT CONGRESS KNOWING IT.

TORTURE MAY HAVE EVEN BEEN YOUR IDEA.

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

ANYTHING UNCLASSIFIED UNDER PRESIDENTIAL ON-THE-FLY CIA COVER-BLOWING AUTHORITY.

SIGNIFIED BY A SPECIAL WINK

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

SECRET: PHOTOS OR DOCUMENTS FOUND IN JACK ABRAMOFF'S HAT

DON'T ENTER MY HEAD SPACE.

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

NOT SECRET: PHOTOS OR DOCUMENTS FOUND IN JACK ANDERSON'S COFFIN.

DON'T HOLD OUT ON ME!

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

MILITARY OFFICERS' PERSONAL OPINIONS OF DONALD RUMSFIELD: SEDITIOUS!

HIS HAIR SMELLS FUNNY.

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

NOT SEDITIOUS: SECRET DISAPPEARANCE AND GULAG TRANSPORT OF SWARTHY GENTLEMEN.

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

SECRET: ILLEGAL WIRETAPS.

NOW THAT SOMEBODY LEAKED IT, AL QAEDA STOPPED DOING CONFERENCE CALLS.

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

NOT SECRET: PEOPLE'S INTERNET VIEWING AND BUYING HABITS.

WE'RE NOT...