Topic Avoidance as a Boundary Management Strategy in Communication With a Mother‐in‐Law

• Published date: 01 April 2021
• Author: Valerie J. Young,Jocelyn M. DeGroot
• Date: 01 April 2021
• DOI: http://doi.org/10.1111/fare.12409

V J. YHanover College

J M. DGSouthern Illinois University Edwardsville

Topic Avoidance as a Boundary Management

Strategy in Communication With a Mother-in-Law

Objective: To examine the relational outcomes

of daughter-in-law (DIL) topic avoidance with

her mother-in-law (MIL).

Background: DILs are known to use disclosure

and topic avoidance in an attempt to main-

tain independence and privacy with MILs. We

hypothesize that DILs also use strategic topic

avoidance as a boundary management process

to regulate interactions.

Method: Women (N=180, Mage =36.84)

completed a cross-sectional online survey of

open- and closed-ended questions regarding

self-disclosure, topic avoidance, relationship

closeness, trust, and uncertainty. Analyses

included qualitative thematic analysis and cod-

ing for open-ended data, and a parallel effects

mediation model for quantitative data.

Results: Topic avoidance statistically mediated

the association between self-disclosure and rela-

tionship closeness, trust, and uncertainty. Qual-

itative coding revealed avoidance motivations

used by DILs to create boundaries were based

on specic topics, personal characteristics of

the MILs, and coordinated responsibilities to

another person.

Conclusion: There are several reasons why

DILs avoid communication with MILs. Topic

Department of Communication, Hanover College, 517 Ball

Drive, Hanover,IN 47243 (youngv@hanover.edu).

Key Words: in-law relationships, mixed-methods, privacy

management, relationship quality,topic avoidance.

avoidance is one way that DILs control privacy

boundaries with MILs.

Implications: DILs should be encouraged to

develop rules regarding their own communica-

tion of private or co-owned information with

MILs. These privacy management rules can fos-

ter independence in an involuntary relationship.

Socialized kin-keeper roles for women in fam-

ilies tend to be consistent: maintain family ties

and communication between members of the

family (Leach & Braithwaite, 1996). In the case

of mother-in-law (MIL) and daughter-in-law

(DIL) relationships, DILs may feel compelled

to establish, manage, and balance connections

and boundaries with MILs (Rittenour & Soliz,

2009), and more generally to establish fam-

ily communication patterns for the new family

constellation after marriage (Turner, Young, &

Black, 2006).

Although talking about oneself openly and

honestly with an MIL may be a helpful way

for DILs to forge a relationship (Lawton, Sil-

verstein, & Bengtson, 1994), DILs may control

or limit disclosures to MILs for a variety of

reasons specic to the person(s), information, or

topic (A & Guerrero; 2000; Guerrero & A,

1995a). Communication privacy management

theory (CPM; Petronio, 2002) identies the pro-

cess of coordinating and controlling disclosure

based on privacy rules specic to the person

and the relationship. One privacy management

strategy, topic avoidance, is a focal point of

this study. Given women’s role expectations

408Family Relations 70 (April 2021): 408–421

DOI:10.1111/fare.12409