Too progressive.

• Author: Rundles, Jeff
• Position: RUNDLES [wrap-up] - Viewpoint essay

After the debacle of 2009, I had high hopes for 2010. Rather than the rebound and recovery I had expected, or at least was hoping for, this year, as it turns out, is becoming one of recalcitration.

All my life I have known people whose basic metier was being an expert on what is wrong with everything, but they were the exception--crabs and complainers, but at least in the minority. Now being in opposition--and only opposition--has been elevated not only to majority status, but bathed in holiness, or at least holier-than-thou-ness.

I want to be for things, but advocacy is now anathema. If you want to get ahead, don't be behind anything. Being against it--being against anything and everything--is the key to advancement. We used to be pro-active; now we're anti-active, with equal amounts of anti and active being the key ingredients in success.

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I want to be successful, too, and as much as I'd like to advocate reform, I'm convinced I'll have more impact being solidly against things. So here goes.

I'm against banks. They don't make loans, so what do they do? Screw 'em.

I'm against mass transit. Losers ride the bus.

I'm against "green" initiatives. Sound and fury, signifying nothing, Tales told by dummies.

I'm against government at any level--federal, state, county, city, school boards, cemetery districts. Government seems to be the only place creating good-paying jobs, and I'm against that.

I'm against taxation and representation. One leads to the other, then to the other, and so on.

I'm against war and peace, and I can make cogent arguments why support for either is asinine.

I stand firmly in opposition to diversity. Whoever you are, I'm against you.

I'm opposed to health-care reform. I am also against the present health-care system, but any alternative would be worse, so there you have it. I hate small business. Why? I'm against whiners.

I'm against free trade. It isn't free, and the "trade" part seems to be one sided.

I'm against lawyers, especially litigators, but also prosecutors, U.S. Attorneys, attorneys general and attorneys in general. So sue me.

I'm against higher education. What are they teaching those kids? I'm against that.

I'm against Wall Street. Up, down, down, up, panic, bliss. Sounds too much like bipolar...