The proxy rematch.

• Author: Durst, Will
• Position: OFF THE MAP - Jeb Bush and Hillary Clinton

Might want to stuff your pockets with gravel and hang tight to the rail as our ship of state lurches toward an election pitting Jeb Bush against Hillary Clinton to see who's going to take command of the helm. The brother versus the wife. Sounds like a probate lawsuit.

Don't know about the rest of the electorate, but this premise promises to energize comedians everywhere, since it ensures the resurrection of all our 1992 Bush/Clinton material. Recycling meets nostalgia. It's the green thing to do. Together again for the very first time. "Bush/Clinton II: This time it's personal." Now, we just need to coax Ross Perot back into the fray.

If Jeb does win his party's 2016 nomination, that would mean a Bush on the GOP's ticket seven out of ten Presidential elections. This is so far past dynasty we're trespassing on antitrust territory. The whole Bush family could be prosecuted under the Sherman Antitrust Act. Having John Ellis follow his brother George Walker and father George Herbert Walker into the Oval Office would grease the chute for fifth graders to be able to recite the names of the last five Presidents, though. "Bush, Clinton, Bush, Obama, Bush." Like a club sandwich. With Clinton as the turkey, Obama as the bacon, and the Bushes as the white bread. What could be more appropriate than that?

Meanwhile, the GOP is trying to nip all this dynastic chatter in the bud by pointing out that Hillary would be a sequel as well. But a sequel is not a dynasty. She's only the second Clinton to run. Much different than three candidates from the same family. By one. Doubt if a third Roosevelt could get elected.

Besides, Hillary is a woman. A concept that Republicans don't seem overly hip to. The only woman they'd be comfortable nominating would be Barbara Bush. Not as a candidate, but as a production facility. They fail to grasp how the first person with a y-chromosome deficiency to top a ticket is a big deal. Nor do they seem to understand the...