The Pirates of Penzylvania Avenue.

• Author: MONTANYE, JAMES A.

Gen: It's a glorious thing to be the Economist-General. (sung) I am the very model of a market-free economist, By leanings I'm a Marxian, a Keynesian, a Socialist; I advocate that government supply our basic goods for free, And I'll deliver when I get some meaningful authority. I earned my academic stripes at Harvard, Yale and MIT, I have no limitation where it comes to making policy; I formulate hypotheses behind a veil of ignorance, And stand on moral principle when it makes economic sense. All: He stands on moral principle when it makes economic sense. Gen: I help the government decide which policies are fair and just, It hardly ever happens that these policies cause boom and bust; In short, in matters Marxian and Keynesian and Socialist, I am the very model of a market-free economist. All: In short, in matters Marxian and Keynesian and Socialist, He is the very model of a market-free economist. Gen: I'm very good at integral and differential calculus, My math-onomic theorems lie beyond the realm of usefulness; I maximize efficiency dynamically and statically, And validate my work with data chosen democratically. I redistribute property to make life Pareto optimal, And allocate sunk cost wherever it is unavoidable; I banter demographics and political economy, And proudly flaunt my tolerance for homoskedasticity. All: He proudly flaunts his tolerance for...