The Center of the Universe.

• Author: Lynch, Michael W.
• Position: Campaign fundraiser; gay Republicans; tax reform

In which our man in Washington dines with dairymen, ponders politics with gay Republicans, and investigates interns

Date: Mon, June 28, 1999 11:46:59 AM

From: mlynch@reasondc.org

Subj: Expensive Dinner

"Is that John Ashcroft?" a woman asked, complaining that the dim light made it hard to identify members of Congress. I speculated that the lights were low to give the crowd of pale corporate lobbyists a simulacrum of a tan. She suggested that it was to hide the fact that we were basically in a barn - the D.C. Convention Center, one of the few facilities large enough to hold the 3,300 guests at the 1999 Republican Senate-House Dinner.

It's high fund raising season in Washington. Presidential candidates and members of Congress are rushing to pile up the dough before the June 30 filing date. So lobbyists are busy dropping off $1,000 checks at breakfasts and dinners for politicians they hope to influence. I did my part - even breaking a date with the Lovely Wife - by accepting an invitation to the $1,500-a-plate dinner. I thought it might be worth monitoring.

I attend a lot of Washington events, but this was my first $1,500-a-plater. And I must say, it differed a bit from think tank dinners. No appetizers, for one thing - not a single stuffed mushroom.

The crowd was unfamiliar as well. You get to know the faces on the wonk circuit. But I recognized few in this crowd, and it wasn't just the lighting. My host had purchased half a table, which meant that I got to eat with some strangers, representatives of the milk producers in a Midwestern state. The first course, a "goat cheese and caramelized onion tart," upset them. It's disrespectful to make cow people choose between eating goat cheese or forgoing the first course.

The audience showed an equal disrespect for the speakers, all "powerful" members of Congress. As House Speaker J. Dennis Hastert (R-Ill.) spoke, Senate Majority Leader Trent Lott (R-Miss.) standing stiffly at his side, you couldn't miss the rising din. The longer Hastert spoke, the louder it got. The room grew even louder as Lott worked through his remarks. I sat quietly, working on a glass of Columbia Crest Cabernet Sauvignon and enjoying the scene. It's hard to think of these guys as powerful while they perspire before a rudely indifferent crowd.

Why plop down $1,500 and waste an evening at such an event? It's certainly not for the video that contrasts braying donkeys with gracefully running elephants. It's not for the food, not for the drinks, and not for the company at your table, unless you happen to be seated next to an influential congressman.

I can think of two reasons. First, to buttonhole a member and apprise him or her of your concerns. (Hence the frustration with the dim lighting.) Rep. Jennifer Dunn (R-Wash.) popped by our table for a chat. We ran into Rep. John Boehner (R-Ohio) on the balcony enjoying a smoke.

Also, I imagine it is important to have one's name on the list. It's a roll call, a bed check or, more accurately, a bankroll check. But once the festivities start, there's no reason not to get into some conversation, even if the speaker of the House is trying to tell you all that he plans to do for you. It's like recess without yard narcs.

The flip side of the crowd's indifference to the speeches is that they aren't long. The entire program lasted a bit over an hour, after which it was on to the...