Teaching kids to delay gratification.

The philosophy of instant gratification is pervasive in American society today. In an era of "instant everything," can children still learn the value of delayed gratification? Moreover, if they can, why should they?

"Getting what you want--and getting it now--definitely is more exciting to people than the topic of character-building," according to psychologist Eric Dlugokinski, University of Oklahoma Health Sciences Center. "In a sense, we've done it to ourselves by demanding that life not be difficult and that everything be |made to order.' But sliding through life believing that the world owes you something or demanding immediate access to things--thinking you must have them to be accepted, beautiful, or whatever--simply perpetuates the instant gratification stage of infancy. |Instant magic, you-fix-it-for-me' desires are all signs of infancy that we need to grow out of."

Learning delayed gratification is an essential part of growing up, he maintains. "Kids who go through life getting everything they want aren't at all prepared for coping with and facing the world, and they typically become dependent on someone else to cope for them. The major challenge for parents is to teach their children that certain things can only be obtained by working for them. Perseverance and patience are two virtues that should...

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