Tattle Tales.

* Wild blue yonder: Complaining that hard-partying employees left a company jet in "beyond acceptable" condition, Wachovia has threatened to ground anyone it catches flying too high. In other words, too much booze, you lose -- your job.

* Getting better all the time: In the July 2002 issue of The Kenan Institute Business Forecast, Center for Business Forecasting Director James Smith wrote: "Nearly every new economic indicator each week gives testimony to the strength and robust nature of the current expansion in the United States. This year will see economic activity at all-time record levels, and next year will be even better."

* And don't come Bach: Roll 'em over, Beethoven ... To chase loitering teens from its downtown bus depot, the Charlotte Area Transit System will replace recorded calls of hawks and owls, used to shoo pigeons, with classical music. "If we play a certain genre," a spokeswoman says, "people won't hang around."

* Hip-flop: Doppler is dope, but viewers of Raleigh NBC affiliate WNCN didn't appreciate it when two weathermen rapped the forecast. President and General Manager Mike Ward didn't bother busting a rhyme when he issued an apology the next day: "It will never happen again."

* Being there: Community College System President Martin Lancaster asked all 12 of Roanoke-Chowan Community College's trustees to resign. Two...