Talking God.

• Author: Feldman, Michael (American radio host)
• Position: What Do I Know? - Essay

Once every two weeks, sometimes more often, President Bush gathers with the Vice President and the national security adviser in the newly refurbished White House Situation Room and peers, electronically, into the eyes of the man to whom his legacy is so inextricably linked: Prime Minister Nuri Kamal al-Maliki of Iraq. . . . Sometimes, said ah official who has sat in on the meetings, they talk about their faith in God. --The New York Times, July 25, 2007

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Bush: I wonder, Nuri, if we could start with a little prayer to ask the Almighty's guidance in our endeavors?

Maliki: Of course, but could we perhaps invoke Allah--the Almighty is the Jews'.

Bush: That so? Jehovah? Thought we were pretty safe there. Not, you know, Yahweh. Actually, you know, a real Jew won't call Him anything, not even a reference.

Maliki: Yes. Nonetheless, it's strictly Old Testament. We might humbly beg guidance from Allah.

Bush: Allah, Yahweh. Sounds pretty close.

Maliki: There are ninety-nine names of God in the Koran, none of them is Yahweh. There are other names for God in the Aramaic version of the New Testament called "Peshitta."

Bush: Think we'll take a pass on that one. I wouldn't be calling the Bible a piece of Peshitta. As for God, I don't suppose Jesus or maybe a more general "Our Savior" would do? That covers a host of sins. Muhammad, for one.

Maliki: (responds in Arabic).

Bush: OK, Allah will work for me. Got used to the Methodists, I can get used to anything. Raised Episcopal, folks still are. Church of England, really, stateside. They let the Evangelical Lutherans in, but I don't keep up with it. Women priests and gays and such. Less so with the Methodists.

Maliki: In Al-Fatihah , the first chapter of the Holy Quran, there is the verse "Maliki yaum al-din ," Master of the Day of Judgment.

Bush: No kidding, you're in there, Maliki? And that's what I hope you'll be on the Day of Judgment--September 15. Master of it. How about that? No Georges in the Bible. Either Testament. John, Pauls, Jobs.

Maliki: Perhaps we should move on.

Bush: You bet, let's just, why don't you chant one of yours this rime, and I'll do John 16:something next time, and we can just switch back and forth like that for each video conference.

Maliki: OK. Well, it's a little bit out of place, without the ablutions and so forth. Sirata...