State of siege.

• Author: Poniatowska, Elena
• Position: Latitudes - From A Necklace of Words: Short Fiction by Mexican Women - Excerpt

I walk along the main avenues, the wide black surfaces, the sidewalks on which everyone fits and no one sees me; no one turns around, no one looks at me, not a single one of them. Not one person shows the least sign of recognition. I insist. Love me. Help me. Yes, everyone. You. I see you all. I try to magnetically draw them towards me; nothing retains them, their gazes slide over me, erase me, I am invisible. Their eyes avoid resting on any one thing, and I look at them all so intently, I imprint them on my soul, on my forehead; their faces bore into me, they accompany me; I imagine them, I recreate them, I caress them. We women treasure faces; in fact at any given moment life becomes a single face that we can touch with our lips. Love me, see me, here I am. I put all life's forces on alert; I want to pass through the panes of the box-office window and say "Senora, senora, it's me," but nobody, nobody turns their head, I am as smooth as the opposite wall. I should yell at them, "Your community would be incomplete without me, no one walks like me, no one has my laugh, my way of wrinkling my nose when I smile, you'll never see a woman...