Rule 4: Be Relentlessly Polite

• Author: Daniel Small
• Profession: Is a partner in the Boston and Miami of ces of Holland & Knight LLP
• Pages: 89-94

Don’t tell witnesses to be polite; tell them to be relentlessly polite—and

relentlessly positive. This is not etiquette advice. It’s a survival technique.

Being polite in this environment can be a tough, often thankless, job,

but it is one that is essential to being a good witness. It’s hard work, but

it’s necessary. The experience of being a witness can run the whole gamut

from a polite, friendly session to an angry, adversarial one. Some matters

are more emotional than others, and some questioners are more confron-

tational than others. With all the different factors that may inuence how

the questioning goes, it’s often hard to predict whether you may experience

these kinds of problems.

It doesn’t matter. Whatever the tone of the questioner or the questions, your

response should always be the same: coolly, unappably, relentlessly, even infu-

riatingly, polite and positive. Start that way at the beginning, and do not change

until it’s over. It’s all about understanding the audience and the challenge.

The Audience

As discussed earlier, we spend a lifetime talking to the people who are talk-

ing to us. It’s the natural thing to do. But one of the hardest adjustments to

this very unnatural witness environment is understanding that that is not

what’s happening here. The lawyer is generally not the main audience: it’s the

judge, jury, or other nder of fact. So, arguing with or getting angry with the

lawyer will only interfere with your communicating with the real audience.

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Chapter 17

Rule 4: Be Relentlessly Polite

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