OUR EXCEPTIONALLY UNEXCEPTIONAL FUTURE.

• Date: 01 December 2020
• Author: Farsad, Negin

It's May 2021. Joe Biden has been President for four months, presiding over a somewhat divided government. There's a frisson of ecstatic boredom in the air.

Ecstatic. News. Boredom. There's so much stability you end up speaking with your friends and neighbors. You're forced to retreat to other pastimes, like Ping-Pong, needlepoint, and diet fads. "Should I try keto?" you might hear someone say on the street.

Ya know what? It's 2021, try keto! Or try the one where you eat like it's biblical times. Or the one where you eat every three hours. It's a new era, try them all!

In 2021, the nerds have reclaimed their rightful place as guardians of political minutia. No one knows the name of the head of the General Services Administration. In fact, people have gone back to not knowing...