Let the pantsuit dance.

• Author: Durst, Will
• Position: Off the Map - The next Democratic Party presidential candidate - Column

Time to address the burning question singeing the lips of every red-blooded American: What happens to Bryan Cranston's porkpie hat after Breaking Bad ends its run? OK, maybe that's number two. The big one is who's going to be the next Democratic Presidential candidate in November of 2016? After all, only thirty-seven months and counting.

Having languished almost an entire year without the least meager of Presidential campaign treats to munch on, we cold-turkey journalists are doing whatever it takes to jump-start a tasty plate of appetizers. Nor to mention it's that time of year when less is going on in Washington than on the edge of a vacuum in a crater at the southern-most base of Neptune's thirteenth moon. At night.

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

So that's where we find ourselves: gazing into various sizes and strengths of crystal balls, finding nothing but three kinds of fuzzy. Then dissecting it in columns and on panel shows with each of us focused on a different thread of the same fuzz. At a volume that would peel wallpaper.

If you suspect this might all be a tad premature, your instincts are correct. This sort of wild speculation doesn't normally kick in until a year and a half out (two years, tops), but the accelerated pace is today's norm. Rapid is the new sauntering. Welcome to The Constant Campaign. 24/7 plus.

Then again, come to think of it, we do have a point. President Obama's second term has already entered its eighth month. It is almost a sixth over. The guy is history. Spent. Taking up space. Got the "How Can We Miss You If You Won't Go Away" Blues. Way beyond lame duck, he's a differently abled Turducken. His goose is undergoing severe cookage.

Barack could easily nip all this suspense in the bud by stepping down and giving his second in command a valuable leg up. Because Joe Biden can use as many legs as he can collect. Enough to scrimmage the Rockettes.

Dash precedence, this upcoming job opening is not Biden's for the asking. He's going to need a crowbar the size of Idaho to pry the nomination from a certain someone with eight years of history in the White House, albeit in the East Wing. But not baking cookies, thank you very much.

Obviously, Republicans consider that former tenant the...