Tilting at windmills: junketing judges; killers on the loose; Bill Gates, bully; the man who brought us Paula; the rise of the personal stylist.

AuthorPeters, Charles
PositionCurrent events - humor and commentary - Editorial

For several years I've been complaining about the renewed glamorization of smoking by Hollywood. Having been one of the poor fools who started smoking to imitate the movie heroes of the forties, I had welcomed the near absence of smoking in films of the '60s, '70s, and '80s, at least in the case of characters who were supposed to be admirable, so I have worried that the return of the glamorization in this decade might lead to another generation of fools like me.

Now comes evidence that I was right to worry. A recent chart in The Wall Street Journal showed that while the leading character smoked only once in five top movies of 1990, he smoked in 26 scenes in five comparable films in 1996. In this year's big hit, "Titanic," Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet smoke. The movie producer argued that his purpose was not to encourage tobacco use but to illuminate character, that DiCaprio's smoking showed he was a free spirit while Winslet's was an act of rebellion against a stuffy parent. Of course it was in the hope of displaying just such qualities that my friends and I started smoking in the '40s. The appeal is equally insidious today. Tobacco us6v among teenagers has risen a third since 1991, according to a study reported last month in The New York Times.

Young blacks are smarter about tobacco, smoking at a little more than half the rate of whites. But Hollywood is getting to them, too. Eighty percent more are lighting up today than in 1991.

Some embarassing news about the federal judges who are complaining-about being overworked and asking for additional judges to be assigned to the courts: it seems that, according the General Accounting Office, in a 32-month period ending Oct. 1 these judges found the time to take 4,670 non case-related trips lasting 11,767 work days to destinations that included Luxembourg, Italy, England, Russia, Egypt, India, and St. Kitts and Nevis. "One of the jet-setting jurists," reports George Clifford III of Congressional Quarterly, "flew to Australia for a conference sponsored by the Australian Swim Coaches Association."

One way blacks are not being smarter is that they are not using seat belts. According to a report in the American Journal of Public Health, only 44 percent of young black males are buckling up, compared to 54 percent of white males. Females as a group are much better than males, but black females are the worst. This strikes me as particularly unwise, since it is well known that some cops tend to look for an excuse to stop black drivers. Of course, the police shouldn't be that way, but why give them a legitimate reason?

The Styles section of The New York Times continues to give its affluent readers the information they need to stay chic. You will recall the pioneering article on how to hire and fire a personal trainer. Now comes the inside skinny on personal stylists. These, the Times explains, are "part wardrobe specialists, part image therapists ... the people who hunt through department stores, boutiques, ateliers, and showrooms in the quest for that ... perfect dress ... who book the makeup artist, kidnap the overextended eyebrow-shaper and arrange for the hairdresser, the trainer, and the personal chef." Their fees, in case you're interested, range from $1,500 to $5,000 a day.

Think you can't afford it? Well, another Times article may have the solution. It says that instead of paying the $5,000 for the bottle of 1982 Chateau Petrus to go with your dinner at the St. Regis' Lespinasse, you can "amble a few doors west on 55th street to Michael's, a popular spot where the very same wine goes for a mere $1,000."

Styles also offers tips on how to cut down that $30,000 to $40,000 you have to shell out annually to keep your daughter in one of the glamorous jobs in the fashion industry where she may be underpaid but might also meet and marry a Kennedy, a Koch, a Roehm, or a Trump. Here's the secret, according to Styles, of the...

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