Work Title: How to Create a Magical Relationship
Work Author(s): Ariel and Shya Kane
211 pages, Softcover $16.95
Reviewer: Amy Rea
With the divorce rate in the U.S. holding steady at fifty percent, it's clear that a successful marriage doesn't just happen. But the divorce rate does seem to imply that a healthy marriage requires a great deal of work, especially if each partner isn't willing to put in an equal share of the effort.
Not necessarily, say the authors in their latest book. Married for more than twenty years, the Kanes are also relationship coaches and have written Working on Yourself Doesn't Work: A Book About Instantaneous Transformation. They have spent decades studying how and why people succeed or don't) in personal relationships. Their premise is that there are three "Principles of Transformation" which make a difference: anything one resists persists and grows stronger; no two things can occupy the same space at the same time; and anything one allows to be exactly as it is, without trying to change or fix it, will complete itself.
However, this set of principles doesn't apply only to everyone else. The Kanes say that it takes two to start a fight, but one to end it; they urge readers to look within before trying to solve external conflicts. When someone is more accepting of self and partner, that is likely to be mirrored by the...