Helping teenagers face money limits.

For many teenagers, prosperity has been a way of life. Times generally have been good, the 1980s "greed is good" philosophy was predominant, and affluence was taken for granted. However, this has come to an abrupt halt in many cases as the middle class faces job squeezes and unemployment. Parents feeling the financial pinch often aren't sure how to begin saying no to offspring who expect a continual stream of luxuries, from designer sneakers to a free ride through college.

"Part of the difficulty is that middle-class and affluent parents usually establish a giving pattern when the children are very young," explains Wanda Draper, professor of psychiatry, University of Oklahoma Health Sciences Center. This sets up a pattern of expectation which manifests itself particularly strongly in the teen years, when these children are very influenced by their peers and concerned with their appearance."

Rather than go into debt or do without necessities trying to satisfy the child, she suggests that parents should bite the bullet and make some hard decisions about where to spend the family's finances. They also should not feel guilty because they are unable to provide things they previously could.

Any economic decisions or "cutbacks" - and the reasons behind them - should be shared with the teenager. A frank explanation of the family's economic situation is a good place to begin, examining the budget and bills. "Teenagers have the math skills to understand the numbers. They may not like what they see, but they can't deny the reality of the figures."

Many teens will empathize with their parents once they are aware of the...