Work Title: CSI Editing
Work Author(s): Alex Moore
Byline: Alex Moore
"'I know what you're thinking, punk,' hissed Wordy Harry to his new editor, 'you're thinking, "Did he use six superfluous adjectives or only five?"---and to tell the truth, I forgot myself in all this excitement; but being as this is English, the most powerful language in the world, whose subtle nuances will blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: "Do I feel loquacious?"---well do you, punk?'" Stuart Vasepuru's opening sentence was the runner-up in the annual 2006 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, an international literary parody competition.
The weapon used by Inspector Callahan in the 1972 movie Dirty Harry was a .45 Magnum, "the most powerful hand gun in the world." In Kate Flora's AfterWord, "Hand Me the Red Pen or: There is No Safety on a Glock," she laments the crime of poor editing providing a headline tracer about a pistol that lacks a safety. Editors not using magnifying glass-scrutiny will miss this error, but CSI editors will discover that, yes, there is no hammer safety, only an internal safeguard device preventing accidental discharge. Flora, past president of Sisters In Crime and author of seven Thea Kozak mysteries, mentions murderous editing.
Mrs. Brooks seeing the blood spot growing and finding the carving-knife missing rushed with alarm into the streets of the glittering "fairy-place," Sandbourne with its colorful piers and promenades. Alec was stopped, sopped in a pool of his own blood; Tess had fled looking for despondent Angel. Eventually both, wrapped in the fog of despair and desperation, stumble upon dew-damp and dreary Stonehenge. Sandbourne and Stonehenge contrasting in sparkle and specter mimic the demeanors of character. Edward Morris, CSI editor and author of A Killing Froth, in his ForeSight Mystery, "Here, There & Everywhere: The Geography of Murder," believes "The most engaging mysteries are those in which...