A commentary on Ephesians 5 and headship.

• Author: Lickona, Lisa

INTRODUCTION

In Ephesians 5, we encounter the celebrated analogy of the love between Christ and the Church and the love between husband and wife. Seen in the light of Christ, the ontological ordering of man and woman "from the beginning" bears within it an ethical obligation: man and woman are called to give of themselves. (1) Thus, the author of Ephesians 5 pronounces these commands:

Be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, be subject to your husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. As the church is subject to Christ, so let wives also be subject in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. Even so husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no man ever hates his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. "For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one." This is a great mystery, and I mean in reference to Christ and the church; however, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. (2) For a theologian, Ephesians 5 is a scintillating passage. It suggests that the most common and mundane realities--the love of man and woman, sex, and childbearing--are of themselves open to the life of grace; that what seems almost instinctual--the drive of romantic love--reveals its highest meaning in a profound mystical union: the love of Christ for the Church and the union of God and man in the Eucharist. Not surprisingly, Ephesians 5 stands as one of the decisive texts for the theological works of Pope John Paul II, especially his celebrated Theology of the Body. (3)

And yet, Ephesians 5 is at the same time one of the most troubling passages for theologians and pastors alike, because it contains the famously one-sided command that a wife "be subject" to her husband, who she is to consider her "head." (4) In Mulieris Dignitatem, Pope John Paul II stops just short of apologizing for the command to wives that is "so profoundly rooted in the customs and religious tradition of the time." (5) He contrasts the "old" teaching of wifely subjection with the innovations of the Gospel message. As an example, he cites the revolutionary teaching of Galatians 3:28 rejecting the distinctions between man and woman, slave and master. (6) Nevertheless, Pope John Paul II never rejects the teaching of the subjection of the wife to the husband, but exhorts us to interpret it in context. "[T]he challenge presented by the 'ethos' of the Redemption is clear and definitive. All the reasons in favor of the 'subjection' of woman to man in marriage must be understood in the sense of a 'mutual subjection' of both 'out of reverence for Christ.'" (7) In the end, Pope John Paul II clears the way for a new approach to the question of the subjection of the wife to the husband within the context of marriage as a "mutual subjection," a shared vocation of love. (8)

This Article considers the following questions: What could the submission of the wife mean when we interpret it within the context of the reciprocal and mutual communion of love and life that marriage is intended to be? What function could this submission have within marriage? And finally, what meaning could it possibly have in our modern context?

Part I of this Article discusses some very obvious observations about maleness and femaleness drawn from personal experiences as a wife, mother, and farmer. This is in no way to trumpet the priority of experience, but on the contrary, to ground these reflections in the ordinary expressions of gender in the created order. This reflection naturally brings us to the findings of biology, sociology, and anthropology. Part II of this Article draws out these reflections on creation by meditating on the meaning of the mutual relation of man and woman as an image of Trinitarian communion, that is, within the context of John Paul II's "theological anthropology." Part III of this Article considers the vocation of the woman and the possible anthropological significance of the woman's subjection. Finally, the conclusion tentatively considers the impact of wifely "submission" in our current situation.

1. MALE AND FEMALE

   When looking squarely at maleness and femaleness, as presented in the created order, we are struck first of all by difference. This difference is clear in the animal world. For instance, in the raising of dairy goats, every female is a prize. Females bear the kids and produce milk. In this world, males are essentially used as studs. A male is really only valuable if his mother or sisters are prize milkers. Any male that does not have an excellent female pedigree will not be kept for breeding. Males will be euthanized at birth, raised for meat, or saved as pets.

   This is because in the animal kingdom, it is all about procreation. The female of the species is the "place" where procreation happens. Males generally have greater size and more impressive horns or tusks. But most of this is there for the sake of alluring or defending the females...