Closing the Gap without Getting to Yes: Staying with the Shared Parenting Debate

• DOI: http://doi.org/10.1111/fcre.12077
• Date: 01 April 2014
• Author: Peter Salem,Arnold T. Shienvold
• Published date: 01 April 2014

CONVENORS COMMENTARY

CLOSING THE GAP WITHOUT GETTING TO YES:

STAYING WITH THE SHARED PARENTING DEBATE*

Peter Salem and Arnold T. Shienvold

This issue of Family Court Review (FCR) is an outgrowth of the Association of Family and

Conciliation Courts (AFCC) Think Tank, Closing the Gap: Research, Practice, Policy, and Shared

Parenting. The think tank, which we co-chaired, was an interdisciplinary gathering of thirty-two

family law practitioners, policy makers,social scientists, and legal scholars convened in January 2013.

It represents AFCC’s best effort to continue an important and often controversial discussion about

research, practice, policy, and shared parenting. In fact, it is more of a combination of two conver-

sations about inextricably linked topics. The first is about policy and practice regarding longstanding

debates concerning parenting time and decision making, also referred to as joint/sole custody, legal

custody, or physical custody to name just of few of many existing labels.1The second conversation,

the role of social science research in family law policy and practice, appears to have become more

dynamic lately.

Historically, and perhaps more so in recent years, these conversations have generated significant

conflict within the family law community. Our backgrounds as mediators help us to view such

conflicts as natural and potentially productive. We acknowledge that AFCC has, in some ways, played

a role in the development of this friction. Moving forward, we hope to help facilitate discussions that

lead to greater clarity about the issues, about where key disagreements lie, and that promote the

sharing of positive and open communication about the challenges that we, as a professional commu-

nity, confront. While unanimity about these issues may be a laudable goal, it is not presently realistic

given the state of the research and ongoing advocacy. Nonetheless, there is much to be accomplished

short of having everyone in agreement.

THE CONFLICT: A BRIEF BACKGROUND

For several decades, AFCC has been at the center of, and at times challenged by, both of these

discussions. Although AFCC does not typically make policy statements,2it has historically been

characterized (probably accurately so) as having members whoby and large support—and many who

have been on the vanguard of promoting—shared parenting time and decision making. For example,

the early writings of Dr. Isolina Ricci, author of the popular shared parenting treatise Mom’s House,

Dad’s House, appeared in the Conciliation Courts Review (now Family Court Review) in 1974.3Since

then, numerous articles have been published that advocate for shared, cooperative co-parenting after

separation and divorce. The roster of AFCC Board members, conference presenters, and journal

authors over the years is a veritable“Who’s Who” of professionals who have developed and supported

mediation programs, co-parenting classes, and the movement toward shared parenting time and

decision making.4

As shared parenting appeared to become widely accepted among the AFCC community, challeng-

ing issues such as domestic violence, alienated children, and high-conflict families have entered into

Correspondence: psalem@afccnet.org; rsapsy@aol.com

FAMILY COURT REVIEW, Vol. 52 No. 2, April 2014 145–151

© 2014 Association of Familyand Conciliation Cour ts