1976, August, Pg. 1098. From the Wool-Sack.

• Author: by Christopher R. Brauchli

5 Colo.Law. 1098

Colorado Lawyer

1976.

1976, August, Pg. 1098.

From the Wool-Sack

1098Vol. 5, No. 8, Pg. 1098From the Wool-Sackby Christopher R. BrauchliBefore the time when the commonly accepted altemative to passage of the Bar examination was to sue the Supreme Court and the board of Bar examiners, conventional wisdom had it that the principal obstacle to becoming a successful lawyer was passing the Bar exam. That, as anyone who has practiced for even a little while knows, is nonsense. The stxret to becoming a successful lawyer is to find a good secretary. Having once encountered a not so good secretary wha subscribed to the Conspiratorial Theory of Office Machine Repair, a theory of whose existence few people are awarc, it may be worthwhile to pass on its characteristics to you.

Anyone who has any kind of equipment in his office more sophisticated than a manual typewriter knows that from time to time the equipment may cease to function as its manufacturers advertised, if notjntended, it would. On these occasions offices are thrown into turmoil and tempers become short. People with more sophisticated equip: ment know that the more sophisticated it is the more it is apt to be seized by prolonged periods of indisposition and to resist even the fondest ministrations of those trained in tending to its wants.

The Secretary who subscribes to the Conspiratorial Theory of Office Machine Repair (CTOOMR) will wan- der into the employer's office following the Office Machine Repairman's (OMR) fourth unsuccessful visit and suggest in hushed tones, while casting furtive glances about the room, that something strange is going on in view of the fact that after four visits the machine still does not function properly.' Indeed, my acquaintance, who was an exponent of the theory, suggested without a trace of a smile that the failure of the OMR to fix the machine was a deliberate effort on his part to sabotage our law office, a notion which I...