Don't let your legacy succumb to the sitcom effect.

AuthorBader, Lawson
PositionEstate planning, donor-advised funds

It's the standard sitcom formula: Person A does something, which person B completely misinterprets. A mess is created; hilarity ensues. Twenty minutes later, person A and B finally have a conversation. All is resolved - cue the poignant music.

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That's fine when it's on TV. But will this Sitcom Effect be the script for your own estate plan and charitable intent?

Money magazine reported on several studies that indicate "70% of wealthy families lose their wealth by the second generation, and a stunning 90% by the third." A 2010 Mellon Private Bank Client Study points to two simple reasons why this wealth fades so quickly: passing on money is difficult, and passing on family values is equally difficult.

Why is it such a challenge? Often because, as in a sitcom, there is no discussion at all, just occasionally observable but unexplained practices. Only 24% of high net worth individuals actively encourage their children to invest in a shared family financial goal. Only 39% agree to involving family in financial decision-making.

And just like in a sitcom, there is only one way to resolve the problem: more communication.

Parents who fail to talk about issues of wealth, values, and mission are most likely to have trouble down the road. As an April 2016 conference call from Family Business and SEI noted, if you are silent on topics of wealth, your children will interpret that silence to mean the subject is taboo.

Better to invest time discussing your values than to remain quiet. Engage the next generation in dialogue, mentorship, and experiential learning to understand the benefits and burdens of wealth.

The point about values plays into charitable giving. What if one reason subsequent generations drift from their parents' and grandparents' charitable interests over time is that the original generation simply didn't...

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